How to Overcome Any Fear

The Paradox of Safety and Fear

Have you ever thought about the paradox of safety? How the very thing we seek to protect ourselves from can sometimes become the source of our greatest anxieties?

Now don’t get me wrong, safety can be good. But right now everyone around us craves safety so much that fear rules our lives.

There's this sociologist, Frank Furedi, who thinks we're all a bit too hung up on feeling vulnerable. He says we're taught to fear the future and see ourselves as fragile beings in constant need of protection.

But here's the thing— is all this safety obsession really helping us out? Or is it holding us back from reaching our highest ideal? And worse… what is it doing to our mental state?

Today, I want to explore the illusion of safety and how fear can breed mental illness. I also want to show you how we can break free from the illusion of safety and reclaim our mental sovereignty. So pull up a seat, and let's dive in.

The Historical Perspective: Risk-Taking vs. Modern Safety Obsession

Right now, in today's world – safety comes above everything else. That wasn’t always the case. In fact, if you look through the history books, people had a reverse mentality to fear that we have currently.

You see, way back in medieval times safety came second to just about every venture. Leaders took risks for the betterment of their civilizations. They had to. Because risks meant something new. A path forward. Discoveries. New inventions. And even new worlds.

Look back in history, and you'll see that some of the most advanced civilizations of their time had no fear.  Take for example, Ancient Athens and Renaissance Italy – they were all about taking risks and being brave in the face of uncertainty.

Going back to Furedi who I mentioned in the beginning, he had a lot to say about safety. He said that when we play it too safe, we miss out on some serious growth opportunities, both personally and as a society. Plus, when we're all about safety, we kinda open the door for governments to come in and take away our freedoms. Which of course can lead to some serious problems in society.

Furedi warns us about this in his book “How Fear Works”. He shows us that prioritizing safety above all else diminishes the value of freedom, paving the way for tyrannical rule as individuals surrender their liberties in pursuit of security. This ‘safety above all’ combined with fear and uncertainty just breeds a culture of dependency on authority figures. This in turn perpetuates a cycle of oppression disguised as protection.

Other figures in history had some thoughts on the subject as well. John Stuart Mill said it best—when we're all about staying safe, we end up sacrificing our freedom. Or as Benjamin Franklin said:

“Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.”

But let’s not lose hope! Throughout history, there've been some incredibly brave people who stood up to tyranny and fought for freedom. Nietzsche suggests that true heroism requires confronting challenges head-on. That greatness comes from taking risks and facing danger. So, what do these great men in History teach us – they all echo the idea that we should ditch the safety blanket and embrace the unknown. There is a difference between living and existing. Living has a purpose. Living has meaning. Living is experiencing everything life has to offer. Merely existing is just going through the motions with zero emotions.

Seneca, in his book “On the Shortness of Life” shows us that having grey hairs and wrinkles doesn’t show how that someone lived long, but rather it shows that they have existed for a long time.

The other element of living in fear is what it does to those around you. Or rather how you care for those around you. For example, let’s say you care about someone, or you care about a community or a cause in general, but you are unwilling to risk anything or face any danger. Then we’ll have to question how genuine your care and concern are because courage, which is essentially the capacity to face danger, is intricately connected with care and concern. That’s exactly what Alasdair MacIntyre in his book “After Virtue: A Study in Moral Theory” explains. When looking outwardly, fear harms us. But what about what it does inwardly?

The Psychological Impact: How Safety Obsession Leads to Mental Illness

What happens to our mental state when we live in fear? We foster anxiety… we let fear grow into anxiety which results in mental illness. Knowing everything I just told you, let me paint you a real-life picture of what fear can do to a human. Our story will be about a girl named Sarah. Sarah's parents, like any loving parents, wanted to keep her safe from harm. They taught her to look both ways before crossing the street, to avoid talking to strangers, and to always wear her helmet when riding her bike.

All good advice, right? But here's where the illusion of safety begins to take shape.

As Sarah grows older, she starts to internalise these lessons not just as practical safety measures but as dire warnings of imminent danger. That danger can be lurking around every corner. She becomes hyper-aware of possible danger. She is constantly scanning her surroundings for potential threats. She avoids certain places and situations that seem too risky, even if they hold opportunities for growth and joy. And slowly but surely, her world begins to shrink, confined by the walls of her own fear.

Now, let me ask you this: Is Sarah truly safe? Physically, perhaps. But what about her mental well-being? The constant state of anxiety, the overwhelming fear of the unknown – these are the invisible shackles that bind her, imprisoning her in a cage of her own making. Well, to be more precise, it’s her parents' making.

Now Sarah is out of her parent's house. She is all grown up, she can make her own decisions about the world and how she interacts with her environment. But here is the major problem. Fear has been so ingrained in her upbringing that she knows no other way of living.

What’s worse is that she doesn't have her parents guiding her. Fear becomes her guide. This fear carries on with her into every aspect of her life. Her job. Her relationships. As a result, she keeps her circle small and her environment small. Mentally Sarah can become anxious. Even just the smallest amount of fear will grow like a weed if not taken care of. So mentally, Sarah will just get worse without proper help.

But Sarah's story is not unique. In fact, it's all too familiar for many of us. We live in a world that bombards us with messages of danger and disaster at every turn. From news headlines screaming of impending doom to social media feeds filled with tales of tragedy. It's no wonder that fear has become the currency of our times.

And yet, for all our efforts to fortify ourselves against these perceived threats, we find ourselves more anxious and unsettled than ever before. It's as if the walls we've built to protect ourselves have become our own personal prisons. Trapping us in a cycle of fear and despair. But here's the thing: fear is not our enemy. It's a natural, instinctual response designed to keep us safe from harm. The problem arises when fear becomes disproportionate to the actual level of threat. When it begins to dictate our thoughts and actions in ways that are detrimental to our well-being.

Breaking Free: How to Reclaim Mental Sovereignty from Fear

So, what's the solution? How do we break free from the illusion of safety and reclaim our mental sovereignty? The answer lies in understanding that true safety is not found in the absence of danger but in the resilience of the human spirit.

It's about recognising that we are stronger and more capable than we give ourselves credit for. That we have the power to confront our fears head-on and emerge victorious on the other side. It's about embracing uncertainty as a natural part of life, rather than viewing it as something to be feared and avoided at all costs.

But most importantly, when we live on the edge of fear – there is no growth. There are no steps forward. We simply exist in our safety bubble.

And so today I’m going to challenge you to live a little more dangerously. The illusion of safety is just that – an illusion.

If this current generation doesn’t break free from living in fear, what will it mean for our future? What risks will the next great leaders not take… what will we as a society miss out on? And the big question is… will the current generation of fear-minded individuals raise children that live in fear as well? Will this fear cycle end?

I will leave you with this, the Roman historian Tacitus reminds us that the desire for safety stands against every great and noble enterprise. Please comment below this video with what fears you are holding onto right now. I’d love to help you break free from living in fear.

Be sure to like and subscribe, it lets me know you enjoy the content I’m making for you and helps others find this video easier. If you want to dive deeper into this subject, I recommend reading Frank Furedi’s book; How Fear Works.

I’m Dimitris and I share psychology-based insights and tools on how to design a well-lived life. I’ll see you in the next one.